I could not wait to be out of school and an adult in the real world. I always imagined that's when my real life would start. When I'm an adult everything will be perfect. Well I was in dream land.
Ever been to dream land? Its super fun & everything seems perfect until you wake up and realize it's simply that -- dream land. I could kick myself now for wanting to grow up so fast. I feel as if I didn't enjoy my childhood or even my teenage years enough because I was so focused on being an adult.
Adults seem to have it all right...money, homes, fancy trips, cool cars etc. WRONG. Sure some adults have all that but most, especially in their 20s do not. As of right now, I'm venturing into my late 20s. I'm going to be 27 in May and I could not be more freaked out about it.
My entire life I was told get good grades, go to college, graduate then all your dreams will come true. Well I got good grades, went to San Diego State, and studied Communications with hopes of making it in LA behind the scenes of some gossip talk show or E! News. That was my dream. A dream I was pushed to follow my entire life. No one ever tells you the reality of life after college.
They make it seem like if you go to college & graduate you are guaranteed a good job, with good pay in the field you studied. Well I don't know who started this RUMOR but that's exactly what it is; a rumor. Right now I find myself stressing daily about money, wondering if there will ever be a time when I don't live pay check to pay check. I don't have my dream job. Not even close to it. I feel like my life has become one mundane mess after another. I find myself wanting to regress to childhood and not even think about the pressures of adulthood and paying bills.
I just want to curl up in my bed and hide from everything until it's over.
Besides my constant pressures of money, bills and oh yeah those wonderful SCHOOL LOANS I am relentlessly questioning if where I am in my life is where I should be --
Should I be married by now?
So many people I know are already married, and have their first child. I can't help but wonder, where did I go wrong? I'm still living at home in Orange County, trying to make enough money to actually be able to live on my own. I don't know how I got here. I am thankful & blessed though to actually have a job doing Marketing & Social Media for a Real Estate Company during these tough economic times.
I always thought though, your 20s and life after college was supposed to be fun & exciting. I'm still waiting for the fun & the excitement. And as I wait, I will just continue my mundane life of work, sleep, eat, pay bills, work, sleep, eat, and pay bills. Exciting stuff huh?
I'm just your typical girly girly from Orange County, CA venturing into my late twenties, working a normal 9-5 job trying to make it on my own. However, I have started to feel suffocated in my mundane life that I started my own side business building websites called TechSocial OC & now have ventured into blogging about fashion & my life called MessyDirtyHair. The idea for the blog besides getting my creative juices out; is I believe you can still be trendy & chic but natural at the same time. Keep up with my crazy adventure at MessyDirtyHair.com. Why the blog name? My hair most of the time is a mess. Embrace it.