"Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life."
- Mark Twain
When I was a kid, I remember all sorts of milestones that signaled the arrival of summer -- the end of the school year, long days spent playing outdoors, barbecues and beach days with friends. Now that my career path has lead me to a job that operates on a 365-day-a-year, 24/7 basis, the notion of summer is quite different.
Instead of the anticipation and excitement that used to accompany this lovely seasonal change, I'm now faced with the realization that summer has less to do with the rising temperatures and more to do with the re-appearance of the season's mascot, which we airline folks refer to simply as the "summer flier."
The definition of a "summer flier" is as obvious as it seems -- it's meant to classify those people who tend to fly only once or twice a year (the holidays would be the second time of year, and the "holiday flier" presents in much the same way). Due to the fact that summer fliers aren't exposed to the nuances of airline travel as frequently as others, they can often find themselves in uncomfortable (literally) and embarrassing situations that can easily be avoided.
If you and your family are "summer fliers," I'd like to share some tips that might help make your annual pilgrimage through the sky a more enjoyable one.
First off, we've all heard the saying that "life is a journey, not a destination." I like to apply this to flying by advising travelers to DRESS for the journey, not the destination. Airplanes can be cold -- very cold. As flight attendants, we have little control over the temperature in the aircraft. The pilots are the ones with all the knobs and buttons. While we try and communicate with them until we get a comfortable setting, there's no way to ensure that everyone onboard is going to be content.
That being said, I'm constantly amazed how many people board the aircraft in Cabo San Lucas or Maui expecting to find a swimming pool in the center of the aisle. Tank tops, shorts, and bathing suits are becoming the norm when it comes to flying fashion. I can predict with a fair amount of accuracy the amount of time it will take someone dressed for a luau to come and find me in the galley and ask the ever-popular airplane question- "do you have any blankets?"
The answer to this question (no matter what airline you're traveling on) is most likely going to be a resounding NO. Those blankets were banished after the swine flu outbreak.
I break the news gently, considering that the shivering person in front of me has so much sunburned skin exposed that I'm afraid they might need medical attention. And did I mention the fact that the flight is bound for Seattle?! What happens when we arrive in the Pacific Northwest and are greeted with 40 degrees of "welcome home?" Their painful trip is only just beginning.
My advice is to dress in layers -- always have a lightweight jacket or sweatshirt handy that can double as a blanket or pillow during your flight. I know it's hard to think about blankets and sweatshirts when you're basking in the sun with an umbrella drink in your hand. But remember that once the glass is empty and the sun sets on the last night of your vacation, you're left with the realization that you're once again headed back to the airport to board what might be a very cold flight home.
Yes, you want the memories of your vacation to last forever. That's what cameras are for. It's time to put the bathing suit away, and recognize the fact that the sand at your feet has been replaced with faded airplane carpet.
Grab a sweatshirt out of your carry-on bag, and get comfortable. You'll be the envy of all your tank-topped flying friends.
Plane Jane has been a flight attendant for the past 9 years. She is based in Los Angeles, and flies domestically and internationally. Yadda yadda yadda (need another funny, creative line after this too, right)?